The movie of my life

Does film imitate life, or does life imitate film? The topic is highly debated. I find that my life is a movie. It's just on going, and you don't know how the end will be. I have a weird feeling that when my life has ended it will have the ability to be broken into a three-act structure. Furthermore, I consider all of my downfalls, not only learning experiences, but installments in my E True Hollywood Story. People like myself have to plan for such events. So if life is but a play and all the people merely players, then we are constantly having new characters come in and out of the scenes of our lives. In the past few weeks a new character entered my film.

INT. ANDREW’S HOUSE - NIGHT

A tall and slender AARON GREEN sits on a chair across from Michael. Michael had previously heard about Aaron but they had never met. Actually, Michael had no idea that the person sitting in front of him was Aaron.

Dissolve to:

I find it interesting how quickly people can become connected. Sometimes friendship takes a lot of work and sometimes they just work by themselves. Both are rewarding in different ways. Aaron is similar to me, most likely why we get along. Most likely why he asked that I write about him in my blog. I'm sure that if he reads this he'll be moved, if not, I was bored anyway. Aaron and I were supposed to watch Barbershop tonight at his house but time slipped away and I don't feel like riding the bus all over town, so we rescheduled. Instead, I called Gunita and asked her to listen to Celine Dion and make sweet love to me. She declined.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that I may have to check Gunita into a home soon.

Gunita and I spend all of our lunches together. We recently spent a day with our friends Martin and Chris celebrating their son Sebastian's second birthday. What a fantastic day! On the way home, during a period of silence, I explained to Gunita that you know you have a good friendship when you can sit with a friend in silence and not feel uncomfortable, especially on car rides. On road trips people seem to have conversation for a while and then have a long period of silence to reflect or think about other things. Then the conversation picks back up again.

Our lunches are like this. We were eating at one of the design centers by our work, a place that looked like a hospital. Gunita and I were not talking, experiencing a comfortable silence, when I noticed a large glob of Dijon trying to become an icicle on the tip of her chin. I took my napkin and wiped it off calling her a senior citizen. We laughed uncontrollably, and then returned to silence. If these comfortable periods of silence become too long, I may have to check her into a home. Here she'll have the luxury of spontaneous exercise in front of vending machines whenever she chooses.

That lunch with Gunita was just once scene. Some scenes are worth remembering and some end up on the editing floor. We take the good scenes with us, and leave the bad ones behind. Sometimes we take the bad ones, but it's important to remember that only so much can be done in editing. Sometimes, we need to make the edit and move on.

The answer to life's questions

I've been getting a lot of flack from people because I haven't made a posting in a while. What's that all about? Here I thought no one even read this damn thing because my last posting, which was in my opinion hysterical, received only one comment. Apparently there are loads of opinionless people reading my blog so I need fulfill my commitment and write about something. I like to keep my postings about films as this is a film website but sometimes I need to post about life. This is where I vent, and where I breath. So here goes.

I have watched a few movies lately. I've been trying to lead a more low key lifestyle so I have been watching a lot of movies. Last Friday night I watched Life as a House. I love this movie, but it's sad, so if you don't like sad movies, I wouldn't recommend this one. Then on Sunday I watched Welcome to the Dollhouse, another funny movie. This movie is amusing but I don't feel like the main character has that much of a character arch which leaves you feeling pretty much the same at the end of the film as you felt when you started the movie. I don't really like that, I like to feel differently after watching a movie. I usually sit down to watch a movie for a reason, and this movie doesn't seem to have much reason. On Monday I watched Amalie. This movie is spectacular. If you haven't seen it then you really need to get on it! Then on Tuesday I watched Misery. This chilling film still gets to me and I have seen it so many times. Very good, but it's a bit twisted so if you can't handle that sort of thing, I wouldn't watch this one.

That pretty much it for movie stuff. As for life... well that a whole other posting. I went to 111 Minna last night and hung out for a while. I think it was Beth who said she could write a book about that place. I think someone should. Or at least make a pilot for a sitcom. Beth and I amused ourselves by playing the straight game. That's basically where I try to pretend that I'm straight. I can't talk, cause that ruins it, so really it's a sort of stance that I was working on. Every time Jackie looked over I was trying to check her out. The illusion was ruined quickly because every time I would get my stance convincing enough I would laugh, clap my hands a lot, and jump up and down. I suppose that's not really a straight male quality but it certainly gave us a hearty chuckle. By the end of the night Jackie was checking me out. She was moist. I know it.
Maybe I need to make a film about life in San Francisco. A movie about me and all of my hopelessly single friends. None of us can figure out why we are single especially considering we always seem to have the answers to all couples problems. Are we too smart to get into a relationship. Obviously with the knowledge that we already have our relationships would be very successful. They would be like power relationships. We would all attend couples parties and couples dinners and answer for each other. This posting has really taken a turn for the worse so I'm going to stop.

Screw it. Stop reading if you're bored, I'm going to keep going. The week before at minna we were talking about how guys try to remove a wedgie. Imagine, if you will, that a man is walking down the street. Then, an uncomfortable sensation begins to grab at his under carriage. A situation that could be easily resolved by placing your hand at the base of your jeans and tugging downward, is over powered by public embarrassment. Instead, the better option seems to, in mid stride, bow your legs out as if you just got off a horse. This movement opens the butt cheeks and releases that caught material that has caused the undesirable sensation. Once released, normal walking resumes and the wedgie is just a thing of the past. Ridiculous how this walk makes us laugh so hard. We walk around Minna trying to perfect it. People who don't know us must assume that we all have some sort of disorder that prevents us from walking like normal people. Yeah, sure, we're the weird ones.

So I saw this guy at the bank, and he was at the teller window, and he did the wedgie release, but while he was standing still. Can you imagine? I look over and the man lifts his right leg in the air out from his side and makes a motion like he is doing the breast stroke upright and out of water. Good thing he choose that option. You wouldn't want the teller to see you pick your wedgie. That would be embarrassing. The smarter option is to let a line of waiting people watch this little indulgence that I consider social suicide. I laughed out loud.

Laughing out loud is one of my most favorite things, when you are by yourself and you see something so funny that you can't help but laugh out loud. Everyone around you will assume that you're some sort of crazy person. And only you will know what is so funny. These are little games that we can play with ourselves to keep entertained. Try it sometime. I promise, you won't be disappointed.

After Minna I foolishly attempted to go to Anu. Why? Everytime I go there Gunita manages to make me stay while she mingles and I try to figure out where I am. "Michael, come with me, we are going to take Cece home." What? I'm in the car on the way to Milbrae. What the hell is Milbrae? I have no idea, but it's nearly midnight and I'm there. Gunita's sharp driving skills left us circling the domestic terminal at the airport. Do I have to check bags in the United terminal to get back to Anu? I'm confused. Suddenly we were on luxurious 6th street homeward bound. I was back in the bar before I knew it trying to figure out where I was. Jeffrey Allen came over and said, "are you ok? SMILE." Was I not smiling? I had no idea. I think people are used to me smiling because on the rare chance when I am not smiling, eight million people have to ask me who died, or what's wrong. That's annoying, isn't it Jackie?


Ok, someone give me a topic and I'll tell you what I think.